Surrender=Self-Compassion

Picking up where I left off last week…

After that conversation with my coach, the one where she told me to stop, I finally did.

I knew my body needed rest.

I knew my mind needed quiet.

And I knew my clients needed me to show up as the best version of myself.

It took real effort to stop reading, posting, thinking, planning, and strategizing.

But once I did, it was… oddly easy.

Easier than saying no to clients who wanted to get on my schedule when my brain whispered, “You can squeeze one in right here.” or “She really needs support right now.”

Easier than telling someone I have a waitlist.

Easier than raising my rates.

Easier than holding firm to the number of clients that keeps my body happy, my mind inspired, and my clients deeply served.

But as soon as I did all that, I noticed my numbers dropping.

The money slowed down.

And that’s when the scarcity part of me started to panic.

My brain said, “See? You can’t slow down. You’re going to lose everything.”

But the wiser part of me whispered, “You’re getting exactly what you asked for to slow down, to see fewer clients, to work with only the ones you love.”

This is where it always gets sticky, the pull between honoring my needs and chasing the money.

As I write this, I can see it so clearly:

Surrender and self-compassion are deeply connected.

And control, grasping, and attachment? They’re all forms of self-abandonment.

Surrender is accepting your current circumstances with love, just as they are, even if they don’t seem ideal.

Self-compassion is accepting yourself with that same tenderness.

It’s saying, “Okay, this is my life right now. I can be with it.” or “Okay, this is me right now. I can be with myself just as I am.”

When you’re pushing or grasping, you’re not being compassionate.

You’re rejecting what is. You’re rejecting yourself.

But when you soften into surrender, something shifts.

You reconnect with yourself.

You stop trying to be the source of all solutions — and instead, you let life help.

And here’s the wild part:

When I truly surrendered, when I stopped forcing, stopped attempting to manage my outcomes, so much clarity rushed in.

I suddenly knew exactly who I wanted to serve and how.

Within a few days, I signed three new Awakened Wealth clients.

It’s things like this that remind me:

Life is always unfolding for me, even when I forget.

It’s always working out, and it works out even better when my ego takes a nap.

The process of dismantling scarcity patterns takes time and tenderness.

My brain’s been practicing control for 52 years...it’s not going to stop overnight.

Regulation helps: breath, yoga, nature, Brainspotting, slowing down.

That’s how we teach the body that trust is safe.

Because when you stop trying to control, life shows you something better than anything you could have planned.

Next week, I’ll talk a little more about surrender — what it really means, and how to practice it instead of just saying the words.